From the years 2000 to 2002 I ran an online zine, Actionattackhelicopter, along with my friends, Brian and Josh. I was fortunate to interview many musicians whose work I enjoyed. I’m posting some of those interviews here for anyone who may have missed them the first time. They have been edited for length, relevance, and to correct for my poor editing skills at the time of original publication. Keep in mind that these were done over ten years ago, thus individuals’ opinions, thoughts, and ideas may no longer be relevant, but they are still interesting as a snapshot of a particular time and place.
This interview was originally published in October 2002.
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“I’m A Sex Camel”
The Paper Chase (or the pAper chAse, whichever spelling you prefer) is a four-piece from the Dallas area who many people have not heard of, but should have. In what can only be described as a frantic, yet calculated attack, the pAper chAse delivers nothing short of precision on their second release for Beatville Recordings, third release overall, Hide The Kitchen Knives. Recently, after their set at Bloomington Fest in Bloomington, Indiana, singer/guitarist John Congleton and I sat down and discussed panic attacks, religion, and growing up Texas. Bobby, their bassist joined in as well. Eventually the entire band entered in on the conversation, but all of that will remain just between us five.
I was told that you wrote the whole first album based on your experience with panic attacks. Do you care to explain what happened to cause you to write that kind of stuff?
John: First of all, I want to say that the entire album isn’t about panic attacks. It’s about how terrifying life can be. I’m a nervous person in general and I think I hide it pretty well, but I think I’m chewing my fingernails on the inside constantly. It was about the time when I started driving—when I turned sixteen—I think I correlate it back to driving because that was my first major responsibility. I just started having these episodes and I didn’t really know what they were but because I didn’t know what they were it made it all the more terrifying. I was just getting them worse and worse every day and my mom could tell that I was having a hard time in general so she suggested I go to a doctor and talk to him about it. The point, however, is that it’s such a frustrating ailment to have and I know that a lot of people have it so I thought it would be something interesting to base an album off of. And by no means did I write that as a “poor little me” thing. Not at all. I was hoping that a lot of people could relate to it. And it was therapeutic for me.
And how old are you now?
John: I’m 25.
Do you still have them at all?
John: Yeah, but not like I used to. It just depends on where I’m at with my life. That’s the thing with panic attacks: everything can be going fine and then you just have one. I don’t know what causes them and I don’t think anyone does, but I think that if you don’t know how to handle stress at the time when you have them, your body will dose you with that stress at other times when you’re not experiencing stress. It’s just my apish way of trying to explain it. To me, a lot of art is just derivative of things like that. Mine was just a little more direct about that problem. I don’t want anyone to ever think it was about me, because it wasn’t. I think there are a huge percentage of people who suffer from not understanding their emotions.
Well, this is really timely because just a few weeks ago I switched some medications and started taking Paxil and that really messed me up. Before that I had never had anxiety attacks at all, but I started getting them. Just the other night I was laying in my bed at about three in the morning and all the sudden I thought my bed was going to swallow me up. I thought it would close in on both sides and trap me in and I started getting lightheaded and then it felt like something was sitting on my chest.
John: Yeah, yeah, I know exactly what you’re talking about.
And all the sudden I was like, “I gotta get out of bed!” and so I jumped out of bed, grabbed your latest CD and went downstairs to the computer and started writing. But it got me thinking about how good your music is to go along with panic attacks. After that I went outside and started wandering around my yard at four in the morning and then I went inside and went to bed.
John: You want to know what I do?
What’s that?
John: I do menial tasks like clean my fingernails or do the dishes. It helps because it makes me feel as though I am in control. It’s very direct and remedial and it has a schedule to it. You have a pattern how you wash the dishes and you’re in control of that. So that helps me. But sometimes you’re not in a situation where you can do that.
Yeah, it’s weird because I got one the other day while I was reading a letter from a friend of mine. I was just sitting on the edge of my bed and my chest started feeling all heavy and I was having a hard time breathing. I dunno. Did you go on any medication to help you with them?
John: I could’ve gone on medication, but I didn’t want to. I really don’t like the idea of taking things like that. I made the resolution that I didn’t want to go on anything unless I had to and I’m glad I didn’t because I think that I would be a different person possibly. Maybe I wouldn’t be happy with the music I make. It’s all about exorcising your demons in some form or fashion and this is what I do. This is what we do.
How was the reception to that? Did people understand that?
John: You know what’s weird about that is that nobody said anything about that until recently. I had mentioned it in interviews, though. But I don’t think you have to have them in order to relate to the album, because like I said, the album is not about panic attacks. It’s about how frightening life can be. It was the muse. That album was extremely therapeutic for me. I had to do that album in such a small window of time that I almost killed myself because I had to stay up all night and work on it in order to get it done. Even though there are eight million things I can’t stand about that album, it was a healthy thing for me to get it done and over with. It was almost like a spiritual pilgrimage. I remember I slept for two days after it was done. Not to use this ad nausea, but I really feel like I exorcised a demon. I feel like I’m a healthier person since.
Something I had read about the new album was that it was about religious things? I read the lyrics, though, and I really didn’t see it.
John: I don’t think so.
Bobby: The only reason people might think that is because it has the picture of Jesus and Judas. That’s the ultimate betrayal: a true friendship that went horribly awry. Judas sold out Christ.
John: There are references to the Bible all throughout the album. There are definitely things that pop up again and again, but the main thing is just that relationship between Christ and Judas. Something that even if you’re not a Christian, you’ve heard that story. It’s kind of the first story of betrayal in American Christian culture. As far as my thoughts on religion, I don’t think Hide The Kitchen Knives reflects that in any capacity except that it’s a religious belief that I don’t think you should sell people out. Which is what the album is about, a little bit.
Bobby: There’s such a maze there. If Judas hadn’t sold out Christ, then Christianity wouldn’t mean what it does. On the surface, I think it’s a real good example of betrayal.
John: So where were we? Oh yeah, religious message: absolutely not. I’m not in any way a practicing Christian. I don’t condone or not condone Christianity. That’s another interview altogether.
You’re from Texas, though, and it seems to be rooted pretty deeply in the people there.
John: Absolutely. I think the Bible is just a good read in general. Do you agree with everything you read? No. You read it because it makes you a better person. Reading the Bible is just like reading anything else. You can read the Satanic Bible, but it doesn’t make you a Satanist. It just makes you curious. But I’ve always been really fascinated by religious beliefs, so there’s references all the time in my lyrics.
Was that because you were raised one way or the other?
John: I wasn’t raised in any strict Christian home. I didn’t go to church for the first time until I was in junior high. I was always curious about God and the idea of eternal life. I remember at a very young age being curious about what happens after you die. And the only thing I ever heard about was Jesus Christ. So I got interested in that first of all. From that point on it’s just been a constant journey of trying to figure out what it’s all about. But like I said, that’s an entirely other interview, so I really don’t want to get into that. I will just say that I’m extremely spiritual, but not religious by any stretch of the imagination.
[At this point we get into an interesting, yet personal conversation about masturbation in which John proclaimed, "I'm a sex camel."]
